personal
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CW: discussion of possible sexual assault In the midst of the Cornell 7 case coming to light – thanks to the bravery of Jane Doe, who is suing the university and the rapists – I have seen a lot of talk on social media about the fact that not a single man in the group…
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I’m sitting here in the dark. It’s 3:32 am. I have to be up for work in a few hours. Hell, my dog is going to get me up to feed him in a couple of hours. But I can’t sleep. I listen to audios at night to go to sleep. Most of the time,…
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It’s been a little while since I’ve been kissed. It’s been longer since I’ve been kissed well. My first kiss was at summer camp when I was 12. A boy named Mark told me he liked me and kissed me on the lips at the mid-week dance. I was thrilled and enthralled by Mark, and…
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A little while ago, I wrote an impassioned post about making smutty content as long as I wanted to, no matter how old I get. I’ll do it as long as it serves me, I said boldly. Welp. I love to write, but lately the motivation to make things has been lacking. I’m going through…
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I’m so fucking angry. It has taken some time for me to get to this place and now that it’s happening, I don’t like it. It feels like it’s not going to stop. It feels like a wave of fury that is going to knock me off my feet and roil me around in its…
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This is the first year of my adult life when I don’t find myself uncomfortable, standing in front of the Father’s Day cards, trying to find one that feels authentic. Dad, you taught me everything I needed to know… Nope. Dad opted out of teaching me about money, for example, because he said I didn’t…
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Caution: This is a Vulnerable Post If you’ve read enough of my blog you’ll figure out that I am single after a long relationship. Twenty-eight years long, as a matter of fact. We lived together for most of my adult life. Living on my own has been a wonderful experience in some ways. I am…
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The other day, I learned that a VA was having a milestone birthday that’s way in my past, and I messaged a smutty colleague: “Tell me I’m not too old to be doing this.” My bio says that I am GenX, and that identifies me as older than most of the female VAs I’m aware…
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I’ve been thinking about places. I’ve been thinking about how places hold memories of sense and feeling. There was a big old maple tree behind my childhood home, part of an abandoned farm. The ghost of a barn lay crumbling there, along with the rusty skeleton of an old VW bug. I was afraid to…
