Pretty Lynne Writes

Anonymous recently asked on a messaging site to meet me in real life. The individual offered me $450 and when I said they had misread the situation, offered more. I was clear about saying no. In the end, I decided to delete the account and stop engaging. 

I am privileged in that I am a content creator as a hobby. I don’t need to engage with people to bring them to a paid site. I don’t rely on money from my content as my livelihood. So I have the freedom to decide to remove access to me and my content for anyone at any time I want to. 

I am not offended that the person offered to pay me to meet because there’s something wrong with taking money to meet (and presumably have sex); I’ll defend people’s right to engage in sex work of any kind all day long. Sex workers deserve safety, respect, and fair compensation for their labour, always. 

My issue is that I don’t present myself as a person who is open to that kind of transaction. So when I say no and you (the individual) continue to ask, I think a few things:

1. You aren’t respecting what I say, so you’re not going to be a safe person to be around. 
2. I have the right to control who has access to me and information about me. 
3. You clearly believe that I am a commodity that can be purchased due to the sexual nature of my content. 
4. If I was in fact offering my body in exchange for money, you would be granted the privilege of access by way of paying me. It is not a right for you to have access to me. 

For real, fuck the patriarchy. That power structure is responsible for this bullshit idea of my value. 

Women and femme-presenting people are not, in fact, commodities. 

Some women don’t realize this. They see men as a resource for whom they need to compete with other women. They fight for attention, time, sexual interest, and financial support. They shape their behaviour around that and criticize women for acting outside that paradigm. They often subscribe to a hierarchy of sexual expression – in which selling access to your body is an immoral choice (again, fuck you, patriarchy).

The patriarchy has taught many people to see relationships with women and femmes as transactional. There’s a pervasive belief that women’s value lies in their sexuality. If you believe I am a commodity to be purchased, regardless of how I present myself, then you will believe that the only issue is how much you are willing to pay to have sex with me. My consent and choice doesn’t figure into it. 

To state what should be the obvious: human beings have value by virtue of existing, not for what they can do for someone else. 

Unless I make it known that I’m selling parts of myself, don’t come at me offering me money. 

Listen up, Anonymous.

Reading my stories or listening to my audios: Free.

Spending time with me in real life: Priceless.