Pretty Lynne Writes

It’s my birthday week. Yes, I’m a Leo. Big surprise! 

Many years ago, I hated to have people acknowledge my birthday. I was worried about the attention. I both craved it and feared that it wouldn’t feel like enough. I think I’ve learned that I was worried no one would remember or care about my birthday, so I would pre-emptively insist they do nothing so as not to be disappointed. 

One year, I was working in an office. People wanted to know what I wanted for my birthday. This was in my exuberant youth. I was doing a job at an organization for university students; I was responsible for running awareness campaigns on various social issues. I poured myself into this work. For example, to celebrate Freedom to Read week, I organized a 24 hr long readathon of banned books in a public space. I myself read aloud for at least 6 of those hours. 

I tell you this so you get a picture of the kind of environment I worked in. We spent long hours working on issues we believed in passionately, and I became very close with many of my coworkers.

Anyway, when asked about my birthday wishes, I demurred. I didn’t want anything at all, as per usual. 

On the morning of my birthday, I was called out to the front desk, and found a person dressed in a chicken costume, ready to sing me happy birthday. My friend had decided that I was going to be celebrated even if I didn’t want the attention. There was cake, and later we went out and had a fun night. It was really, really nice. 

Every couple of years, that friend sends me a chicken in some form for my birthday. Some years it has been a tiny figurine, or even a family of little chickens; others, a postcard featuring a chicken. This year, she sent me a beaded chicken keychain. 

We are the kind of friends who love each other fiercely and don’t talk that much. But when we do, it’s as though no time has passed. We’ve been through a lot together. 

I never know when a chicken will come, but I’m delighted when one does. To me, it means:

• I love you
• I see you
• I know you
• You matter to me

I decided a couple of years ago not to worry that no one will remember my birthday, and just tell people. They can choose what to do with that information. And I plan something special for myself in the meantime. I’m worth celebrating, after all. 

I’m going to spend my birthday wish this year on you: May you have someone in your life who knows you well enough to know that sometimes you need a chicken to sing to you, and who loves you enough to remind you of that, year over year.